allielujah: (Default)
I know I never log on here anymore. I need to fix that....

I've updated my etsy shop! I've added three new images and lowered some prices. I have a scarf that I had planned on giving to someone for Christmas but as I doubt I'll be seeing any of my family (and never did decide who to give it to anyway), I'm considering putting it up for sale, as well. I might post some pictures of it later and see what you guys think. It's kinda weird but I like it, which hopefully means someone else would like it, too.

I also have an interesting photography idea that I'm going to think a little more on. If I decide to go through with it, I'll let you guys know!

I'm glad I'm working on it again. Hopefully it will help me get out of this creative rut I've kinda put myself in. And maybe it will help me be able to purchase batteries so my camera doesn't have to sit in its bag all of the time.
allielujah: (Happy blanket.)
I’m so incredibly busy now thanks to school I rarely have time to just sit online. And when I do get online, I have a purpose and tend to forget to check the other things I’m so used to checking. Mostly, the Blogosphere does not enter in well during my school schedule. But I’m starting to get into a more relaxed routine, so maybe that can soon change.

The reason I am updating now, though, so because of what is occurring in my life tomorrow. I’m so excited I can barely contain myself. I haven’t said anything yet because I didn’t want to somehow jinx the opportunity but since I’ve had numerous emails with the owner and confirmation, I feel safe to say something now.

Three of my photography pieces are getting put in a new art gallery in town!

I’m incredibly excited over it. I’m still not 100% certain on which ones I’m going to send it but I think I have it narrowed down. I’m mostly trying to decide if I want to showcase some portrait pieces in the hopes of someone asking me to shoot them (and getting paid that way) or posting just some other shots and put prices on them, in the hopes of making money that way. Either way, I’m hoping I receive some form of cash from this. I’m leaning more toward that last option for now and hoping that I’ll be given another chance to add some stuff later.

I’m still not certain if my pieces will be hung up tomorrow (tomorrow is opening night!) or if they’re going be put on hold, so to speak, for an upcoming circulation. I’m thinking it’s the former but I cannot be certain.

I need to purchase some frames for them. I was going to use what money I had left in the bank to do that but we needed to get me some medicine yesterday and bought some other things, so that idea is now gone. I’ll have to wait until after Maxwell gets paid, purchase the frames, make them all pretty and dash on over the gallery. I forgot this tidbit when I suggested a meeting time but I think I can work it out okay.

Other than that great news, everything else has been kind of blah. I’ve been in a few applications but have yet to hear back from anyone. Friday, I’m calling every day care in the phone book and seeing if they are hiring. I just keep praying and hoping my luck will change soon.

I know I need to remain positive and I’m sure I’ll be able to get back on that road soon. But for now, with two tests coming up and the gallery tomorrow, my stress is going to take hold for a while, I believe. And once I start stressing about one thing, every other thing I am/should be stressing about seems to come more into focus. I’m still hopeful, though it’s running low. Something has to change soon, though, right?
allielujah: (Happy blanket.)

Classes started back on Monday. I didn’t have a class until 10:10, which led me to believe I could sleep in. This, though, was a completely ridiculous thought. After driving around for about thirty minutes in the parking lot on the side of campus that is the home to my Monday/Wednesday classes, I finally said forget it and drove to the other side of campus. That, truly, was still an adventure and I was only able to quit the journey after creeping behind a girl who (I had hoped) was walking to her car to leave. Thank goodness that was what happened; I’m not sure what I would have done otherwise.

Even with all of that experience, I still had at least twenty minutes before class started, so I was able to relax in the LRC, though I spent quite a bit of that time wishing I still had my job instead of relaxing like the plan was.

My first class was my children with special needs class. It’s my first practicum and my first time working with children with special needs, so the idea of it makes me rather nervous. The two classes this week have gone well, though. (I say two though I suppose it is technically four, since the lecture class and the practicum class are separate classes, one right after the other.

Then I get a break, which found my back at the LRC where I tried to eat lunch, though I was still all nervous over first day back to classes. It’s so odd to me that, at twenty-two, I still get nervous before school starts. I would like to hope that feeling would just eventually go away.

My next class should go well. It’s parental guidance and we’ll be talking a lot about different ways to discipline kids and I could really use help in that matter. The reason I ended my nannying gig was because I could never get control over them. Granted, that family is going through an incredibly rough patch right now which is the reason behind the children constantly head-butting me throughout every detail. While I understand that, I just could not return to just end up crying before I left. But that really has nothing to do with my classes, so I’ll quit the side note.

I had this professor last spring and loved her. Her classes are interesting and the work is easy. As long as you do the work, you’ll do well. Plus, she’s adorable.

Mondays are my late days, with classes from 10:10 AM till 9:30 PM.  While I hate that I’m on campus so much, I greatly enjoy my two Monday only classes so I’m hoping that knowledge will help me get over the “being on campus all day” ughness.

The first of those two classes is sign language and I already love it. I know one person in there, which is cool. We have to know how to count to ten and our alphabet in sign language by our next meeting. I have the counting down but I keep forgetting a letter or two. I haven’t really looked over it too much, though, since our next meeting isn’t until the 14th. (Speaking of the 14th, I have my first test that day. And another one later that week. Why are they giving tests out so early this semester?)

My last class on Mondays is my library science course. It’s over young adult literature and seems like it will be really interesting. We have to read 10 books, 5 of our choosing. With each book, we have to do a little scrapbook page that describes the book. We can take images out of the book for decorations and include a short synapsis or a book review. I’m all excited about the whole deal.

In all of those classes, though, I have to give a presentation of some sort. In my children with special needs class, a partner and I will be discussing ADHD. For my final in sign language, I have to sign along to a song or a children’s book. Sign language, in general, will probably have me in front of the class more often than I would like. While I like my classes, this messes with my head a lot and makes me dread them slightly to a lot, depending. I need to get over the public speaking fear, I suppose. 

My only Tuesday/Thursday class is art appreciation. It’s in a horrible lecture hall with completely uncomfortable seating. But the teacher seems nice and at least I’m greatly interested in the subject matter. I have about an hour, actually, till I need to head over there so I can find a descent spot. We have six exams in there (the first in two weeks), so I’m hoping I can do well and pull an A out of this class to substitute the D I have from a previous class. I hate that I have to take this class again just because I skipped so often the first time. We only had two exams, one I received an A on, the other a B. But I forgot she took points off for not attending lecture. But at least I’m not a skipper anymore. Unless it’s my birthday, but that should be everyone’s right.

This schedule is tiring right now. I know I’ll get used to it eventually, but I’m just so worn out from being on campus all day and having so much information thrown into my head. I had a migraine on Monday and Tuesday from all of it, but things went better yesterday so here’s to hoping that continues.

And while I won’t be partaking in NaBloPoMo this month, I will try to make a better habit of updating. I miss the blogosphere, I truly do. I just need to figure out this new routine. And have a week that doesn’t have my and Maxwell going to his mother’s house or my mom and step-dad coming down to give us their old living room set. On another note, I love his mother greatly and enjoy her visits and our living room looks awesome now and not mushed together. So while these things are incredibly awesome, I need a weekend where I don’t do anything. We’re going back to his mother’s this weekend though so I gotta wait a little while longer before that will happen. 

allielujah: (Happy blanket.)

Yesterday, I received the new that I will not have work study this year due to budge cuts. No email, no phone call, nothing when they first found out. It instead took me going down there for another reason, then just thinking to ask, and for her to tell me. And ultimately ruin my day, for at least a couple of hours.

I dislike going to financial aid anyway due to the fact the receptionists are always rude and always look mad. I understand that they deal with incompetent and rude people all day, every day. That does not give them the right, though, to immediately act mad at every person who walks in there. No one wants to go in there that I know of, and it has nothing to do with the time it takes, the ridiculousness of the things we have to do, the tediousness of it. It all boils down to their rude, pissed off faces, their short comments and the fact that they look at you with such distaste just for walking in there.

After hearing my news, I made it to the elevator before I started crying. I sat in my car for ten minutes crying, texting the few people I knew weren't busy so I could complain. I went to my nanny job about an hour early just because I could not stand going home. I called Maxwell at work and told him.

I immediately felt useless. The daycare job I had lined up also has fallen through (maybe not, but it was supposed to open last week but nothing has yet to happen), so this was just another blow. I finally found a job I love, though, through this work study and now...it's just gone. Now, I'm back at square one and have to go around and beg for jobs. I'm going to go by my old daycare job and see if I could just get at least ten hours a week. I'm going to put up ads around the university center declaring my Awesome Babysitter status.

Maybe I can get some paid photography gigs, though I'm sure that's me just wishing and hoping.

I'm sure it will be okay. I'm feeling better about it all today. It was just such a huge blow and, frankly, I was more upset over the fact that it took me asking to be informed of this news.

 

On another note, I purchased a cross stitch yesterday from Hobby Lobby. It was a $2 one, so supposedly simple but it's been so long since I've done one, I'm almost confused. I'm going to look up a youtube video and refresh my memory. It's an adorable hedgehog holding a balloon.

I purchased it because I found some pin-up cross stitch patterns that I desperately wish to make and hang up around the house. But I know I need so much practice. So I'm going to continue buying these $2 ones, then gradually go up until I feel ready to take on the pin-up one. Plus, I really really needed a new craft endeavor. My knitting has put itself on hold. I cannot seem to pick it back up again, though I will get over that eventually. I hope at least.

allielujah: (allielujah rawrs)

I could not think of a title of my own, so I did a trusty quote search with the word "housewife". There were a few I liked, most of which were just a little too long. This one stuck with me, though. Credit here, plus another one I enjoyed.


I title my entry this even though, technically, I am not a wife and, technically, I am a student and work in a library. There are occasions were I do not appreciate the limitations of words and labels; this just so happens to be one of those occasions.

I choose to refer to myself as one. I choose to clean up our apartment when I am home all day during the summer. I choose to make sure at least the majority of the chores are done before Maxwell comes home. Not because this is what he wants, though of course he enjoys coming home to  a clean home after a long day at work, just as I do during the school year.

I also choose to act as a housewife acts.

This summer, I've been through the lazy, lethargic, sometimes mildly depressed stages that I've grown accustomed to going through. I feel as if I've finally gone over this hump and am acting more like the Allie I know. I think Maxwell is noticing it, as well.

And what made me realize this? I've cleaned the past two days.

Now this might not seem like a huge accomplishment, especially coming from someone who just coined herself a housewife. But the past few months have shown me as being someone who lounged around on the couch the precious days I had not children to watch or no class to attend. Those days showed me enjoying movies, shows on DVD and books, lots and lots of words being processed through my brain while the living room still had dishes glasses from the night before. The dishwasher, full but not running. The sink, full due to the fact that the dishwasher had yet to be use to its full potential. Clothes, still in the laundry baskets. Hey, at least they were clean.

It's as if something has occurred, something rather amazing that has lifted the "ughness" that is related to the daily chore routine and has also kicked my rear end until sitting on it was made difficult. Yesterday, I cleaned the kitchen, gathered the trash, cleaned the living room, put up the clothes, made the bed (why is this the worst chore ever, I ask?). Today, I've done all of those, sans the clothes (no need) and the bed (worst chore ever) and I plan to go scrub the kitchen counters shortly, sweep the floor, maybe even tackle the bathroom.

I hate to use the word burden, but that's what it felt like before to clean. Now, I feel as if it is my duty. My duty to who? Maxwell, myself, both? I'm not sure. I'm just happy that useless feeling that continued to creep into my head seems to have been beaten over the head with a stick.

Or, quite possibly, a broom.

 

allielujah: (Happy blanket.)
I've got my mind on my...what? And my what on my mind?

I don't even know the answer to that anymore.


I'm having trouble sleeping at night. I've stopped taking benadryl before going to bed, mostly because I didn't have to get up at a certain time. Sadly, the only way for me to get enough sleep and still wake up when I need to is to drug myself. But I digress.

So, instead of sleeping even though I'm tired, my ears tune into every slight noise there is around me. The air conditioner turning on and off sounds like someone entering the apartment. The hamster, running in his wheel two rooms over, enjoys freaking me out by not being easily labeled.

Then, of course, are the rude neighbors who constantly open and shut doors and must all sit in separate rooms while hanging out and conversing. This is the only reason I can conjure up for the yelling.

Plus, there is the fact that I am stuck in a three-year-old's mentality of not wanting to go to sleep. This I couldn't explain if a gun was forced against my head. I'm a huge fan of sleeping and always have been; I'm not so sure what's different now. I'd prefer staying up all night and catching a couple of cat naps during the day. Life does not allot time for this, though.

So instead, I sit in here. So tired my eyes can barely stay open but my brain refuses to allow sleep. Maybe starting work soon will somehow help this situation out.

August tenth is the new date for the daycare opening. I'm excited.

December 2009

S M T W T F S
  12345
6789101112
13141516171819
202122 23 242526
27 28293031  

Syndicate

RSS Atom

Most Popular Tags

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags